I feel like the MTC runs on Kolob time. Each day feels like a thousand years, yet when the week is over, I'm surprised I got here. :)
It has been a great week, and I feel like there is definitely momentum building to Germany.
I am so excited to see Patrik on Friday!! I feel so blessed that I get to have the opportunity to see him. The Lord truly is good to me, and He loves all His children so much! That becomes really obvious in the MTC, where the Holy Ghost is so present all of the time. They talk about the gift of tongues, and Mensch, it is a real thing! I think the most interesting thing is that every time I want to speak in German for my own benefit, like to show how much I know, or how much I have learned, it's like I can't speak it, but every time I need it for a lesson, it is there. I really have been feeling a reworking of who I am, and who I am becoming. The most interesting thing is that I have been realizing that there are some parts of me that are not needed for the mission, and are actually better left at home. It's been really cool, but hard. Hard has become my friend. I have been given the opportunity to live what I believe, not just in the gospel sense, but in all the other senses too. :) I always felt it was important to live with joy, even if the circumstances or the feelings were not joyful, and I definitely have been given the chance to do that here.
I decided that maybe I shouldn't pray so much, haha. I'm kidding. But on one particularly difficult day, Sister Carroll and I were sitting on the floor, trying to figure out what was wrong with the day. All of a sudden I turned to Sis. Carroll and was like "Sister Carrolll!! I'm so sorry. I prayed for this!" She was confused, but I went on to explain that I had prayed to love better, to learn more, etc. and this is what I needed in order to learn those things. Answers to prayers come all of the time, but in our limited understanding and slanted perspectives, we don't always recognize the process required to receive what we asked for. God is so much better than we ever give Him credit for.
So our first investigator Maxim turned out to be our third teacher, Bruder Jones. He also served in the Alpine mission and has been back for about 6 months. He told me that I have a Swiss accent when I speak German. :) That made me happy!
German is coming along, I think. I am starting to understand the grammar, and my vocabulary is starting to fill up with Gospel-oriented words.
Our teachers try to speak German as much as possible in the classroom, and we are highly encouraged to speak SYL, or Speak Your Language. So we always try German first, and English second.
We were in the middle of study while Bruder Jones was there, and I was looking at assigned scriptures about prayer in the Book of Mormon. The first one I read was Alma 22:18, which is one of my favorites. Then I read 2 Nephi 32:9, and cracked up. I showed Sister Carroll and we both dissolved into laughter. Bruder Jones came over to see what was going on, and we showed him, and he half-smiled and told us that was interesting. Maybe it is funnier when you are tired, but I thought it was great. It also raises some interesting questions! :)
One thing Sister Carroll and I have been working on is setting goals together. In our leadership calling, we have been trying to set meaningful goals, and as we have done so, the Lord has provided opportunities for us to fulfill them better than we thought we could. Like we wanted to get to know the new Zone Leaders, so that we could have a rapport among the leadership, so we made that a goal, because they were not in our district, so we hadn't seen them too much. But, at the next meal, we ended up next to them in the food line, and we started chatting. That has happened several times since, and now we are all friends. Just little things like that, but it has been such a faith builder!
Also I have been finding new pockets of untapped ego. I've tried and tried and tried to sign up to audition for a musical number for the devotionals, but every single time, something happens. I was annoyed that the Elder accompanist didn't give me musical respect, and said he didn't have time for me. My thoughts ran along the line of "You have no idea! I sound good! I'm not just some dinky flute player!!!!!!" I didn't think I could feel ego in that way, but there it was. It had that "new ego smell" that kind of smells like new car smell. It was terrible! But that's ok. Now I don't have to feel that later!! Then I asked if I could audition on I Glory In My Jesus, but the MTC presidency wives didn't approve of the song. So now I am going to wait until I receive direction. Or try a flute piece with Sister Peterson (in our Branch) in the next week or so. Or something.
I will need new shoes by the time I leave the MTC. All I do is walk in them!!! But every pair of shoes has some chip, nick, dent, or whatever. I think my clothing needs prayers for protection. That puts things into perspective!
Anyway, God lives, He loves, and He cares. I know that without doubt, onions, or anything else.
You can know it too. He asks in Mormon 9:25 for you to prove Him. Even unto the ends of the earth. He has provided convincing evidence, if we are simply willing to experiment on it. Read the Book of Mormon, pray with curiosity and a willingness to see truth, whatever that may be. And I can promise, with a knowledge that is no longer faith, that He will answer. Why? Because He loves you.
Sister Roderer
No comments:
Post a Comment